What to Do If Your Child Says They Hate School: A Guide for Parents
When School Becomes a Struggle
You're not the only parent who's heard the dreaded sentence: "I don't like school." Sometimes it's whispered just before bed; other times, it's hurled during a homework meltdown. And each time, it lands heavy—because beneath that phrase lies a swirl of worry: Are they unhappy? Are they struggling? Have I missed something?
As a parent, it’s natural to want to fix things quickly. But when a child resists school, what they’re really expressing often goes deeper than boredom or rebellion. It might be anxiety, a learning difficulty, a lack of connection with teaching styles, or even something as simple (and complex) as not feeling understood.
Start by Listening With Curiosity
When your child shares that they dislike school, resist the temptation to correct or fix the feeling right away. Ask questions—gently, without pressure—and be curious. A few nudges like "Can you tell me what was the worst part of your day?" or "Is there a moment at school that feels really hard?" can open doors to understanding.
Children between 6 and 12 often don’t yet have the words to connect emotions to challenges. A child who says “I hate math” may feel too ashamed to admit they simply don’t understand it. A child who complains about recess may be feeling isolated among peers. If you haven't yet explored how to spot the signs of how your child truly feels about school, there's often more going on than their words suggest.
Connection Before Correction
One of the most powerful things you can do is reassure your child that their feelings are safe to share—even the messy ones. Tell them it’s okay to feel frustrated, confused, or resentful. This kind of emotional safety doesn't magically fix the problem, but it helps them let go of shame. And where there's less shame, there's more room for growth.
Try not to rush into problem-solving. Instead, validate their experience: "That does sound hard. I think I'd feel the same if that happened to me." From here, together you can begin to gently uncover what’s not working—and what might help.
Reframing the Relationship With Learning
Not loving school doesn’t mean your child doesn’t love learning. The key is finding ways to reintroduce joy, discovery, and confidence in spaces that feel safe and empowering.
Consider carving out time outside classroom hours for curiosity-driven learning. It might be building Lego machines while watching YouTube tutorials on physics concepts, planting herbs and exploring photosynthesis together, or turning a regular walk into a mini nature journal adventure. These simple experiences send a powerful message: learning belongs everywhere—not just in the walls of school.
In fact, many parents have found success when they nurture learning outside of school. It takes the pressure off and offers a bridge back to trust, especially when academics have become a battlefield.
Adapting Schoolwork to Fit Your Child
If your child’s dislike of school is tied to struggles with homework or lessons, it may be time to rethink how information comes in—not just what comes in. Every child processes information differently; some thrive through visuals, others through movement or sound.
For auditory learners, listening rather than reading might make lessons click into place. Today's tools make it easier to adapt: for example, some parents have started using learning apps that can turn written lessons into fun, interactive audio adventures—introducing school material through stories where the child is the main character, using their name to make it feel personal and exciting.
This kind of shift can be a game-changer. Suddenly, homework feels less like a chore and more like a voyage. And yes, one such tool—the Skuli app—does just that: transforming lessons into personalized audio stories for kids aged 6 to 12, so they learn through listening while playing or even during a car ride home.
Integrating multisensory approaches is especially valuable if your child gets easily bored during traditional revision. If this sounds familiar, we’ve written about how to keep easily distracted children engaged here.
Timing and Energy Matter More Than You Think
Ever notice how some learning moments go smoother after breakfast... and others crash after 5pm? Every child has their own internal rhythm. Discovering the right time of day to tackle tricky subjects can make a big difference—especially for children who already dislike school.
Instead of forcing homework at the end of an already long and draining day, consider changing the schedule. Experiment with mornings before school, or quieter Saturday afternoons, when the emotional charge of the school day isn’t looming.
If you want to go deeper, we've explored the best hours for learning in another article: Find your child's learning rhythm here.
Small Wins Build Big Confidence
When a child says they hate school, what they often mean is: “I don’t feel good at it.” And when we don’t feel good at something, it's natural to want to avoid it. That’s why building small wins can rekindle confidence more effectively than any reward chart or lecture.
Take one concept. Break it down. Find just one way for your child to experience feeling capable with it—then celebrate it, however small. You might take a photo of their worksheet and use a tool to generate a multiple-choice quiz based on it, helping them review in a playful way. You might rewrite a tricky word problem into a story involving their favorite comic book character. Or simply say out loud what you notice: “Wow, I saw how you stuck with that even when it was hard. That takes guts.”
If you're feeling overwhelmed, our guide on how to make homework feel easier can offer both practical steps and emotional support.
You’re Not Alone
If you're reading this, it's because you care deeply—and that's already the most valuable tool your child has. The journey to re-light that spark for learning may take time, and you may not see the results tomorrow. But every word of validation, every moment spent transforming a lesson into an engaging experience, every hug after a long school day—these gestures matter more than you know.
School is just one part of your child's world. When we help them reconnect with curiosity, personalize the way they learn, and nurture their sense of agency, we begin to show them that education isn't something they have to fear—it’s something they get to own.