How to Tell If Your Child Truly Enjoys School Between Ages 6 and 12

School Happiness Isn't Always Obvious

"Did you have a good day at school?" It's a question we ask almost automatically. And more often than not, we get a shrug, a quiet “fine,” or a distracted nod. For many parents of kids between 6 and 12, figuring out whether their child actually likes school can feel like decoding a mystery.

But a child’s relationship with school isn't black or white. Sometimes a child enjoys the social aspect but finds the academics overwhelming. Other times, they may love learning but feel lonely at recess. That’s why it’s crucial to take a closer, more holistic look—not just at what they say—but at how they behave, react, and engage.

Notice the Small Clues

Children don’t always talk directly about their feelings, especially when they don’t have the words yet to describe frustration, boredom, or anxiety. They might not say “I don’t enjoy school,” but you might notice other cues:

Energy levels. Do they bounce back from the school day, or come home sluggish and flat, day after day?

Sunday night mood. Do they seem anxious or irritable before the school week begins?

Stories—or the lack of them. Are they eager to tell you about something cool they learned, or do they avoid the topic altogether?

Morning routines. Are mornings consistently a battlefield, filled with dragging feet and stomach aches?

Take note of these patterns over time. One off-day is normal. But if emotional or physical complaints become routine, something deeper may be going on.

Look Beneath the Surface

Alex, a bright 8-year-old I worked with, used to dread math class. Not because he didn’t like numbers—but because the way math was taught didn’t click for him. Every night, he and his parent would argue over homework. His family was convinced he didn’t try hard enough.

Then, they discovered Alex was an auditory learner. When exposed to lessons through storytelling and sound, he flourished. Suddenly, he was asking for math challenges. One small shift reframed his entire school experience.

Sometimes what looks like disinterest is really a mismatch between the way your child learns and the way content is delivered. If your child lights up when watching a documentary but zones out during textbook reviews, they may need information presented differently—more actively, more creatively, or more interactively.

In fact, experts increasingly emphasize the power of active learning, especially for kids who struggle to retain or stay motivated.

Reimagine “Liking” School

Loving school doesn't necessarily mean loving every subject, every teacher, or every peer dynamic—and we shouldn’t expect that. Your child may adore science and art, tolerate language arts, and loathe gym. That's okay.

More helpful is to ask:

• When does my child feel competent and confident?
• Are there moments at school that make them feel curious or inspired?
• Do they feel emotionally safe in their classroom?

Creating more of those "aha" moments—where learning connects to your child's interests or sense of adventure—can reignite their relationship with school. One mom shared how her daughter hated reading until she started rewriting lessons as mini adventures, starring her daughter's name in fantasy quests. It's these kinds of personalized engagement that help struggling learners reconnect with the joy of discovery.

Apps like Skuli can turn lessons into customized audio stories, using your child’s name and favorite themes—ideal for reluctant readers who thrive on narrative and imagination.

Build a Positive Learning Identity at Home

If your child is struggling to enjoy school, your home environment becomes even more important. Children develop their identity as learners from what they experience both inside and outside the classroom. So even when school feels hard, they can still feel empowered—and even joyful—when learning at the kitchen table, during a walk, or in the car.

You can build momentum:

• Turn review time into a game or quiz format (tip: taking a photo of a lesson and turning it into a customized 20-question quiz can make all the difference).
• Play audio versions of lessons during car rides or when winding down at night.
• Explore their interests beyond school—whether that’s sharks, space, or how things are made.

You're not replacing the school curriculum—you're helping them access it in ways that feel doable and enjoyable. If you’ve ever wondered how to keep them engaged during revisions, the solution may be to stop thinking about review as a chore, and more like play supported by learning science.

Reframe Your Role

It’s easy to feel helpless when your child dreads school. But the truth is, you are already playing a tremendous role. By observing, listening, advocating, and adjusting the way learning happens at home, you are offering your child more than support—you’re offering flexibility, validation, and creativity.

And yes, that can be exhausting. But it’s also hopeful. As you keep checking in with your child—gently, without pressure, and with curiosity—you’ll start to see pieces of the puzzle come together.

If you’re also feeling overwhelmed by homework time, know that you’re not alone—and there are ways to make it feel easier for both of you.

In the End, Don't Just Ask—Watch

Instead of endlessly asking, “Do you like school?” try, “What made you smile today?” or “What was hard, but you got through it?” The answers might surprise you.

And remember: enjoying school isn’t a fixed trait. With the right supports, every child has the potential to feel more confident, curious, and connected.

Sometimes all it takes is a shift in how learning is accessed, a new routine, or simply listening a little more closely, a little more kindly. That’s where the real progress starts.