What to Do When Your 6-Year-Old Is Struggling in School

You're Not Alone: The First Step Is Understanding

It’s a gut-wrenching moment many parents face: a school note slipped into a backpack, a teacher’s concerned voice, your child’s eyes cast down when you ask, “How was your day?” If your 6-year-old is already struggling in school, your heart may be heavy with worry, self-doubt, and a hundred questions. Is it too early to intervene? Will this affect their self-esteem? What if my child gets left behind?

First, breathe. You are not a bad parent. And your child is not broken. Early academic difficulties are more common than you think—and they are navigable with the right combination of understanding, curiosity, and support.

The Hidden Layers Behind a Struggle

At six, children are still adjusting to the rhythms and expectations of school life. But when difficulties arise—whether in reading, writing, math, or simply sitting still—they might not directly reflect an academic deficit. Sometimes, what looks like resistance or disinterest is, in fact, a cry for emotional or sensory support.

Take Léa, a sensitive first-grader who seemed to tune out during lessons. Her teacher feared she wasn’t trying. But Léa wasn't disengaged; she was overwhelmed by classroom noise and struggled to focus when multiple stimuli competed for her attention. A quieter environment and audio-based learning materials helped her thrive. Kids like Léa often benefit from emotional understanding as much as academic help. That’s especially true if your child shows signs of being emotionally intense or gifted—topics we explore more deeply in this article on warning signs of unmet needs.

Building a Bridge Between Home and School

Start with simple, proactive communication. Teachers are your allies, not your judges. Ask specific questions: “What kinds of tasks does my child struggle with most?” or “Have you noticed patterns—certain times of day or environments where things improve or worsen?” Teachers can provide crucial context.

At home, begin observing how your child responds to learning in different formats. Some children need movement breaks or quiet reading; others learn best by listening. Experiment gently and watch for what sparks engagement.

Making Learning Feel Less Like a Battle

When school becomes a daily struggle, many families fall into a pattern of conflict: homework becomes a battlefield, tears flow, patience shortens. But helping your child doesn’t mean re-creating the classroom at home; it means turning the learning experience into something they can connect with authentically.

For instance, turning lessons into a game can be transformative. Some parents find success in inventing little treasure hunts around a math problem or creating bedtime stories that weave in historical facts or vocabulary words. Others lean into technology in supportive ways. One mom I spoke with began turning her son's spelling lists into audio adventures where he was the star explorer zipping through space to find lost words—a feature she discovered through the Skuli App, which turns lessons into personalized audio adventures using the child's first name. Her son, once reluctant to even look at a textbook, now asks for his "space mission" every night.

We talk more about how to foster inner calm and focus in emotionally intense kids in this piece on daily calm strategies.

Tuning In To How Your Child Learns

Not all children learn the same way—and that’s not just okay, it’s something to be celebrated. Some kids are visual learners, thriving when pictures and diagrams come into play. Others need to move their bodies, process ideas out loud, or hear information multiple times in a story format.

If your child is struggling with reading, ask: Is it decoding that’s hard, or are they finding it boring? If it’s boredom, it could point to cognitive mismatch, which we touch on in this article on boredom in gifted children. If it’s decoding, perhaps they need more phonics support or practice in a low-pressure environment.

Consider recording lessons or turning them into audio format they can listen to during calm times—like a car ride or while building Legos. For auditory learners, simply hearing the material again (in a story format or just plain audio) can relieve the stress of reading aloud under pressure.

Looking at the Bigger Picture

It’s easy to hyper-focus on academic performance at age 6 because school often feels like a barometer of future success. But academics are just one strand in your child’s development. At this age, your child’s brain is still learning how to manage emotions, build social relationships, develop resilience, and experience joy in learning. All of these matter just as much—if not more—than getting their letters right.

And sometimes, what they need is not another worksheet, but a moment of connection. Ask your child to show you what they’re proud of that day. Celebrate tiny victories. Let them feel seen not just when they accomplish something, but when they simply try again.

If your child ever begins asking deeper or harder questions about their place in the world, don’t be surprised—this can happen earlier than you think, especially with emotionally intense children. We explore these ‘big feelings’ in this article on supporting kids through existential questions.

One Step at a Time

Your 6-year-old’s struggles are not a reflection of failure, but rather a door swinging open. Together, you and your child can walk through it—not with dread or panic—but with curiosity, compassion, and tools that honor how your child learns best. Whether it’s hands-on learning, storytelling, movement, or innovative tools like personalized quizzes from a photo of their lesson, the key is to meet them where they are—not where we expect them to be.

Above all, hold onto this: the relationship you build with your child through these challenges will matter much more than any single report card.