What to Do If My Child Doesn’t Understand the Lesson
When Your Child Feels Lost — and You Do Too
You’re standing in the kitchen after a long day, reheating leftovers, and your 9-year-old slumps into the room, worksheet in hand, eyes full of frustration. “I don’t get it,” they say. Again. And you wonder — what now?
First, take a deep breath. You’re not failing, and neither is your child. Learning isn’t linear. Sometimes, lessons don’t stick right away. That’s not a reflection of intelligence or effort — it’s a reminder that kids, like all of us, need time, support, and the right approach to grow.
Understanding Why the Lesson Isn’t Clicking
Before launching into explanations or trying to reteach the lesson yourself, pause. Ask gentle but specific questions to understand where your child got lost. Was it a tricky vocabulary word? A math formula that didn’t make sense? Or maybe the information was just presented too fast in class. Sometimes, the problem isn’t the content — it’s how it was delivered.
For instance, many children who struggle with reading comprehension aren’t actually confused by the subject. They’re just overwhelmed by the format or pacing. If this might be the case, you may find this guide to understanding your child’s reading comprehension helpful.
Rebuild Confidence Before Revisiting Content
When a child doesn't understand a lesson, their instinct may be to tune out or think "I'm just not smart enough." That’s dangerous thinking, but common. Instead of diving back into the material immediately, validate your child's feelings. Say things like, “This is tough, and it’s okay not to get it the first time,” or, “Lots of kids find this part confusing.”
Remind them that learning is like climbing a tree branch by branch — not swinging straight to the top. Confidence is often the first rung.
Make the Learning Personal and Playful
Once tension has eased, explore alternative ways to present the lesson. Sometimes, shifting the format can be transformational. One parent I spoke to recently shared how her son, who froze every time he saw a paragraph about the water cycle, ended up explaining it enthusiastically after hearing it as part of a story—where he was a drop of water going on an adventure through clouds and rivers.
That’s why formats like turning lessons into audio adventures—where your child becomes the hero of the story—can open doors in their understanding. If your child learns better by listening or during downtime, like car rides, the Sculi app can transform a lesson into a custom audio journey using their name, combining information and imagination in a way that’s hard to forget.
Don’t Teach — Guide
When your child is struggling, resist the urge to take over. You don't need to become their teacher. What they need most is a guide—someone beside them, not in front of them.
Let’s say they’re stuck on multiplying fractions. Rather than jumping into a step-by-step tutorial, ask: “What part do you already understand?” or “What’s confusing about this part?” Their answers might surprise you. They might know more than you think, but are tangled up in a small misunderstanding. You can read more about how to support without taking over here.
Rereading Isn’t Always the Solution
One common suggestion kids hear is, “Just read it again.” But if they didn’t understand it the first time, repetition without adjustment often leads to more frustration. If your child resists rereading—or worse, pretends to get it just to move on—it might be time to steer a different course. Give them tools to reread with purpose, not pressure.
Try turning lessons into mini-quizzes they can do on their own. Tools like Sculi allow you to snap a photo of any lesson and transform it into a 20-question quiz tailored to your child’s level. It’s a low-pressure way for them to engage with the material without the textbook glare.
Watch for Rushing or Checking Out
If your child rushes through tasks or taps out early, it could be a red flag that they’re overwhelmed or unsure—but hiding it under speed or silence. You can learn more about why this happens in this article about rushing through homework. Spotting these signs early and responding with empathy can make all the difference.
What Progress Really Looks Like
Helping a child understand a lesson isn’t always about correct answers—it’s about restoring curiosity and confidence. It’s when a child says, “Oh wait—I think I might get this now,” even if they’re still halfway there. It's in watching them attempt the problem again, not because they have to, but because they want to try.
Your role isn’t to have all the answers. It’s to remind your child that they’re not alone, that learning takes time, and that struggling means they’re trying. And that trying is everything.
Because the truth is, understanding often begins not with the perfect explanation, but with the presence of someone who believes in them.