My Child Gets Anxious Before School Tests: How to Reassure and Support Them

When School Tests Spark Big Fears

It usually starts the night before. Your child, normally lively and curious, grows quiet. They pick at their dinner, stare blankly at their textbook, or cling to you more than usual. And finally, as you tuck them in for the night, the words spill out: “What if I fail the math test tomorrow?”

If any of this feels familiar, you’re not alone. Many parents of children aged 6 to 12 grapple with the invisible burden of test anxiety. While tests are just one way schools evaluate learning, for your child, they can sometimes feel like a final judgment on their intelligence or worth. And the weight of that can become overwhelming.

So how do we help our kids face this challenge—not by denying their fear, but by walking them through it, hand in hand?

Understanding What Lies Beneath the Fear

Test anxiety rarely exists in a vacuum. In many cases, it’s a symptom of deeper school-related stress. Maybe your child worries about disappointing their teacher. Maybe it’s about comparisons to classmates. Or maybe they’ve already had the discouraging experience of doing poorly and now associate tests with failure and shame.

Before rushing in with solutions, start with empathy. Create a space where they feel safe expressing what’s going on. You’d be surprised how often children don’t need you to fix the problem right away—they just need to be heard.

If you're not sure what stress signs to look for, our guide on how to tell if your child is stressed by homework can offer some helpful clarity.

Building Small Wins Into Their Daily Routine

Confidence is built slowly, often in small, quiet moments. Helping your child prepare for an upcoming test isn’t just about drilling facts the night before—it’s about weaving moments of understanding and self-trust throughout the week.

One mother I spoke with told me how her 9-year-old would always get overwhelmed by science lessons. Instead of pushing harder, they shifted their routine: during car rides, they began listening to audio versions of the chapters his class was covering. With just 10–15 minutes of passive listening woven into errands, she watched his comprehension—and confidence—grow.

For kids who are auditory learners, turning written lessons into audio they can listen to on the go can be incredibly empowering. One tool that allows this kind of transformation is the Skuli App, which can convert lessons into audio formats—or even better, into personalized audio adventures where your child is the hero of the story. When their name is woven into the journey, retention improves and so does engagement.

Turning Review Into Play

Children process stress differently than adults. For us, preparation might look like a planner, a study schedule, perhaps even late-night flashcard drills. But for a child already under pressure, these strategies can feel overwhelming. That’s why turning review into play can be a game changer.

One idea: Instead of rereading a chapter for the fifth time, take a photo of that lesson and turn it into a set of short quiz questions. Keep it casual—do it together on the couch or over breakfast. Even better, praise their effort, not just their correct answers: “I love how you thought about that question, even if it wasn’t quite right.” The goal isn’t to get them to memorize—it’s about getting them to feel calm and capable tackling the unknown.

Incorporating small, low-pressure review moments during the week can significantly ease those big pre-test panics.

Shifting the Conversation at Home

Children are always listening. Not just to what we say—but how we say it. When we ask, “Did you study enough?”—even with good intentions—we might unintentionally reinforce the idea that performance matters more than process. A more supportive approach might be:

• “What do you feel really solid on for this test?”
• “Is there anything you're curious about or want to practice together?”
• “However it goes, I love how hard you’ve worked.”

These shifts can help reframe what a test represents—not a threat, but a chance to show what they’ve learned.

Useful reflections on supporting your child emotionally in these moments can be found in our longer piece on helping your child regain confidence at school.

Reassuring Them Doesn’t Mean Shielding Them

It’s tempting to want to protect our kids from stress altogether. But the truth is, some anxiety—when managed and understood—can be a useful signal. It tells your child that something matters, that they care.

Our job isn’t to take that feeling away. It’s to say: “I see you. I believe in you. And I’m here while you walk through it.”

If your child’s school stress goes beyond simple test jitters and becomes a regular pattern affecting their well-being, don’t hesitate to explore our piece on understanding school-related stress or dive into how school stress impacts kids between ages 6 and 12.

And Remember: You’re Doing So Much Right

Just by reading this, you’ve already shown your child something powerful: that their feelings matter. That their struggles don’t scare you. That you’re with them, not just for the victories, but through the vulnerable moments, too.

So if tomorrow morning comes and your child feels a knot in their stomach before their test, take a breath with them. Not to erase the nerves—but to show them that they have what they need. And they’re not alone.