I'm an Exhausted Parent: What Can I Do to Get My Energy Back?

When Help for Your Child Becomes a Heavy Load

There’s this moment—maybe you know it—when your child is sitting at the kitchen table, eyes glazed over their homework, and you find yourself biting your tongue. You want to be patient. You want to be encouraging. But the fatigue pulses behind your eyes, and the words come out sharper than you meant. You don’t recognize your voice anymore. You feel like you’re underwater, running out of breath.

Parental exhaustion doesn’t always arrive in dramatic crashes. Sometimes, it creeps in slowly, hidden under piles of spelling tests, forgotten field trip forms, and math problems you haven’t solved since the '90s. Especially when your child struggles in school—whether it’s with focus, confidence, or learning differences—the emotional load can feel crushing.

If you're reading this and nodding along, you're not alone. And you're not failing. You’re simply human—and you need support, just as your child does. So how can you begin to reclaim your energy while still showing up as the parent your child needs? Let’s start there.

The Myth of the Superparent

One of the greatest myths of modern parenting is that love alone should be enough. If you love your child, you should be endlessly patient, magically wise, and always available. But love doesn’t cancel out the human need for rest, space, and support. If anything, it's a reason to model the very self-care and emotional regulation we want our children to learn.

When your child is facing academic struggles, it’s easy to shift into crisis-response mode 24/7. That mode is not sustainable. Parental fatigue is real, and denying its effects only deepens the burnout. The truth is, your child doesn't need a perfect parent. They need your presence—and for you to be emotionally present, your energy needs tending to, too.

The Small Things That Steal (and Restore) Energy

Fatigue often doesn’t come from lack of time or effort—but from pouring that effort into strategies that aren’t working. If you're spending hours hovering over your child’s homework, repeating explanations they don’t absorb, or fighting about focus, you’re likely expending energy without seeing progress. That’s incredibly demoralizing.

Take Martin, father of 9-year-old Jules. Jules is bright, inquisitive, and utterly allergic to worksheets. Every evening became a battle, with Martin trying new reward charts and consequences in desperation. Eventually, a teacher suggested that Jules might learn better through movement and storytelling. That small insight shifted everything. By turning lessons into stories and integrating playful learning—sometimes even in the car on the way to soccer—Jules latched on. Martin found himself less exasperated and more hopeful, because what they were doing finally fit Jules’s mind.

Not every child needs the same approach. Some kids benefit from hearing lessons aloud rather than reading, or reviewing through questions rather than repetition. It’s here that gentle tools—like the Skuli App, which can turn a written lesson into a personalized audio adventure starring your child—bring a welcome sense of ease. When children are more engaged, parents no longer bear the sole weight of motivation.

Shifting the Emotional Landscape

Part of what drains us as parents is the feeling of walking a road alone. When your child doesn’t fit traditionally academic expectations, it’s easy to internalize that something’s wrong—with them, or with you. But in truth, many children are simply wired differently. They need their strengths recognized, not just their struggles corrected.

Consider what you’d say to a friend whose child was dreamy, slow to start, or distracted: you’d probably show compassion. Offer that compassion to yourself, too. Raising a child who’s outside-the-box doesn’t make you a failing parent. It makes you a trailblazer.

And what if the very qualities that make your child hard to teach now—the vivid imagination, the curiosity, the refusal to conform—are the same qualities that will let them thrive in adulthood? If that feels abstract, spend time with this reflection on how not fitting in can actually be a superpower. Sometimes, the energy you need isn’t physical—it's emotional permission to do things differently.

Your Energy Matters

If this is resonating, take a breath. Yes, right now.

Close your eyes. Imagine what it would feel like to approach homework time without dread. To have even 20 minutes a day that felt wholly yours. To parent without guilt gnawing at your every decision.

These aren’t impossible dreams; they’re guideposts. Start with what restores you, even in small doses. Walk alone around the block. Listen to a podcast while your child reads. Say yes to help when it’s offered. Be mindful of what actually drains your energy—and what restores it.

For everything else—those moments when your child refuses to start math, or wails over reading—remember: you can outsource the struggle without outsourcing your care. You can create routines that work for your child’s brain and still maintain boundaries that protect your peace. You can support learning without sacrificing your mental health.

You Deserve Support, Too

Being a parent is already a monumental job. Being a parent to a child who’s struggling can feel ten times heavier. And yet, there is so much hope. So many creative ways to connect. So many resources to share the load.

If your child gets lost daydreaming in class, here's a piece just for that. If you're unsure why your brilliant child is zoning out during homework, you might find this reflection clarifying and encouraging.

And if all you do today is take one honest moment to acknowledge your fatigue—that's a beginning.

You matter. Your energy matters. And your child is lucky to have a parent like you, who feels this deeply, who tries this hard, who is still reading to the end—hoping to find a spark.